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climb every mountain

**Ok, so I just wrote an entire blog post, and then promptly lost it. Just an example of the kind of day I’m having (see below) Now I’m going to try to re-write it…

So, I arrived in Toronto exactly 2 weeks ago, and to quote Big Chris, It’s been emotional….

Like a rollercoaster, as they say, complete with elating ups and stomach-dropping downs. I have to give full credit for the ups to my amazingwonderful (and very lovely) friends, who have done everything to make me feel at home here. One of these exceptional friends treated me to a evening at Roy Thompson Hall last night, where we watched/listened to the Toronto Symphony Orchestra and vocalists perform some of Rodgers and Hammerstein’s biggest hits. Now, I’ve always been a big fan of musicals, and I never fail to be amazed when a song manages to capture certain feelings that simple speech just can’t grasp. Three-quarters of the way through, I leaned over to my friend and whispered that the only sad part of the concert was that I couldn’t sing along (at least without getting ignominiously kicked out…) Lo and behold, the soloist singing Edelweiss not 5 minutes later invited the audience to join in! Just like in the movie! (Coincidentally, this is also the point in the movie when I lose it, sobbing as if it were my country being wrenched away from me. Something about nationalism that I can’t quite seem to relate to except through song…) It made me so sublimely happy, and all was right with the world.

Until today. Today was just one of those days. One of those days when the world seems to want to laugh at you. Hysterically. First off, I had to pay customs fees for a package that I had to also pick up from the post office. As if I don’t already pay enough taxes. Then, while I was in the PO, the sun came out. Now, I realize that this is normally considered to be a Good Thing. However, I had decided I didn’t need to bother toting my sunglasses with me (I know, I was just asking for it!), and was squinting and cursing the nice weather all the way home. I was also too hot in my clothes at that point, which I absolutely despise! Anyway, I won’t bore you with the rest of the details (except to comment that I’m using my crock pot for the first time, and it smells a bit suspicious… kind of like it might decide to blow up at any moment…)

I’m trying to keep my momentum going with the help of youtube, listening to inspiring musical tunes while singing along and dancing around my room… Join me!

Except that I can’t whistle… I feel like an ugly duckling who will never be a swan when I try…

I CAN sing, though! So here are some more:

I feel like that one is my theme song, right now…

“What will my future be? I wonder.

It could be so exciting, to be out in the world, to be free!

My heart should be wildly rejoicing

Oh, what’s the matter with me?

I’ve always longed for adventure,

To do the things I’ve never dared.

And here I’m facing adventure!

Then why am I so scared?”

I may not be off to take care of 7 troublesome children, one of whom definitely Does Not need a Governess, but these lyrics resonate with me on a personal level right now.

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October 10, 2012 · 8:57 pm